Football season is back !
so far this year has been pretty much a disaster. I’ve just missed out on another job. The job I really wanted. Whilst I await the feedback, I’m told I was’nt far away, which makes it even worse I think. This isn’t the first time I’ve heard this either. I guess I’m the silver medallist of job interviews.
In my early forties, with children and a wife, I lost my job in 2012 when my employer closed up and after a bit of a kerfuffle decided not to open again. Since then, I’ve applied and interviewed lots of positions and been successful only once. I worked for a couple of days at a large multi-national logistics company before being laid off by text message. It was a zero hour contract. This time however I thought I stood a very good chance. I’ve done lots of volunteering and gained tons of experience in the field so to speak. When I attended the interview, which was a series scenarios, I really thought I’d done well. Even though I get very nervous at interviews, I was sure I’d hit my targets and got all the right answers and comments in the right place.
i was truly gutted by not getting selected, and feel a mixture of emotions, and anger. Sick, hopeless, nervous, scared, fraud, helpless, and sorry. I’ve let down my family, myself and put them under immense pressure. With nothing on the horizon I’m looking at 2013 being struck off as another terrible year. If you were to ask me what I did now, I’d say I don’t know ? My wife would probably say I’m addicted to twitter and Facebook, my children the same, but may also add playing tennis on the Wii. I need to find some form of income before the very real risk of losing my home becomes a reality. My wife has found some work, which will help but we need to have more. The national minimum wage is a precarious place to be, and very fragile when your used to a much higher level of hourly pay. Not that I’m complaining, I’m just getting desperate.
i guess 2013 is going to best described as our most challenging year as a family. If we can survive this, well who knows. Until the feeling of sickness and failure leaves, I’ll just go back to watching the football.